Finally found the urgh to blog.

Busy with my diary making, cny prep, job, reading twilight series. blah blah. lame excuses for me not to blog.

haha

ok, first...

The will be cny gathering, my place or jy's unless you want to offer yr home.  refer to class blog for details.Click here!!! 

and... cny is coming!!! omg. won't be around after 29 jan. leaving for malaysia to celebrate with my cuzzins!!! and feast there. all the fucking gd food. hehehe. and have to prepare myself for the weight gain huh? actually i've already gain weight. i am happy nowadays. when i am happy, i gain weight. hmmm...

and poly life... is creeping nearer and nearer to us!!! omg. how sucky can it be? or how gd? i have no idea. just hate the fact that everything will be so strange, weird, unfamiliar. just like the first day of our school in sec 1. pathetic. hope i don't get lost. oh, i print maps of each campus. haha. kiasu. if i still get lost, i will be really dumb, i think i already have. omg....

my parents are so preparing me for poly life. my mum, she seem so willing to get me everything i took off the shelves in the mall. very unlike of her. my dad, dont seem to care. me, is in between. well, i am looking for a strong laptop. not those dumb and retarded. but soething fast and simple. my com is fast, so, i will get really impatient with retarded laptops. my dad laptop is one, not really retarded. but the internet is so slow. like loading and stuff. not my network prob, coz it's really fast on my com. the bloody laptop, took forever to load to watch a movie.

so... wat should i get?

urgh... oh, i want something pink. and yet, works very well... not getting a fashion accessory.

and... JAE posting results on 30 Jan...

i hate unfamiliar stuff...

here i am. again.. just after few minute of posting. ok...more to talk about actually. me and my diary making projects. i sew up the papers to form pages. sew up everything and add in the coulr i liked. they are plain. so, it's kinda easy to decorate and add in all that stuff. i spent so much on those fucking materials. those amout of money could have actually added to buy me a good nice diary, those i've always wanted. and then.. i still prefer making my own one. like diy everything. getting irrelevent materials to add in my book. i love it.

ok, why do i have the idea of that? huh? ok, starts with me, looking for a diary and decided that i could actually personalize it. and also, i could find gd diaries.

but now that i have my own diary projects. other diaries start flooding in to me. like my dad got me a nice business diary and and i bought the school diary.

that's kinda dumb. i am in a dilemma whether to use my dad's diary. damn nice. but, i am still stuck to my own hand made diary. it's not exactly nice,but it's still handmade, everything... i 've added so much details to it by hand. and even if it's ugly, i love it. i love myself and my products too much. haa.

these days were kinda numb. i think. reminds me of those times when i numb myself with work because of all the troubles and boredom. and now, i numb myself, keep myself busy withh all the small stuff. just because i have really nothing to do. like no job and school. those big things i mean, like school or job. those that requires high commitment and that i could get out of home and actually do something.

and, i got sadistic. i miss homework. really. those nights when i mug and flood myself with books. and that everyday seemed so full compared to now. it's empty. very empty. days past quickly now though, but i never knew what i am actually doing. like floating around. on my project which progresses so slowly. one diary per. day. that's kinda pathetic. i hate this and myself.

and kinda hate not going for studies at the start of the year. like not used to staying at home in january. it feels weird. not going to school made it feel like it's not january. my january for the last ten years always starts with new textbooks and feeling fresh. i made me knew or feel like i am in a new year. ... 2010. how would it feel like huh?

being 18..

being 17 is frightening. 

Carol, me different? what's the diff?

ok.. this is the blogger who gave herself excuses and more excuse to not update her damn lonely blog. i bet you see cobwebs here and there. i apologise. happy?

ok, i am busy, sort of. uh.. i decided to proceed with an almost impossible project/task of making my own diary. yeah. diary. one for each mth, diff theme for each mth. ha!

completed jan and feb, and half way of october. the rest of the mths, i dont dare to think. the results will be out on 12th jan. how great? that's god's favourite day, maybe. he can't think of better ways to bring me away out of this world without a third party.. hence, he made use of me going through o lvls and stuff. and then taking the RESULTS. which scares the hell out of me. hey, not third party involved huh? great. just me and HIM. the almighty HIM who made everybody goes through the things we are going through. and i do question existence, why live when we knew we were going to die? why bring ourselves into this world to face war, politics and all that stuff?

ok. this is getting no where.

i am absolutely in love with twilight.

watched plenty of movies today. on net. obviously.

the duchess(my fav!!!)

the lake house.

zack and miri makes a porno

still watching... just my luck.

those movies which i always wanted to watch but had no time for.

weather's cool nowadays. dosen't feel like singapore. as in at night. like now. 2 am. so cold and everything.

haven't sweat in a long while. i miss sweating.