chinese oral today, that stupid teacher ask me more than 10qn for conversation and stutter during passage. gonna fail it. played basketball with the PEOPLE, can't be bothered to list them out. i nid to STUDY, STUDY!!! so sad for myself, can't push myself anymore, the tension of exam nit here yet. lol. people, push me. but kind of frustrated for math, i noe nth. not a single thing that the people were talking abt. MATH!!!! A word to the researchers, pls start brain transplant. some of the cells, or brain tissue may do the job.

studied nth for past few days, even if i study, nth could get in. i am just too distracted. thinking abt how to bluff the way through the exams. i want all passes, 60 for all? possible? not quite? just want to get through and be promoted to 4e1 successfully. today's hyper day. rained in the morning and evening, and kept the weather cool. slept so much. nid to work hard tonite. btw, just saw my guy hamster trying to fuck the female hamster. hope to have good news from them soon!! wish me gd luck for exams. :):)

cat woman's days.. picture day. took pics with carol and fellow cat womans. we've got cat woman pics now!!! me with the braces and fucking bad hair.

CB scolded me during class. So? wat's the big deal? almost cried when she screamed at me. i held back my tears to show i am bloody hell not afraid of her. she says that i look stupid, when she ask me to answer the Qn, but so? i am stupid just another stupid fuckface girl from the class. but so? wateva. she came and asked me who an i talking to, she just want to force anothr fucking answer from me. "i just talked to myself. Happy?" no audience to listen to me talk. when yuqi turned back before that and gave me a hint that CB looking at me. then he got scolded after carol say that he was looking at me but not talking. but NOT TALKING... get it? she dun seem to. Then Yuqi got scolded, cause of me. So SORRY... he is just dragged into this fucking thing for no reason. CB also compared me with a criminal wasting the police's time. i am not a criminal of yr class. CB always find reason to drag Yuqi into the picture. Sucker.
Exam's cuming!!! and carol pls dun say i mug, mum doesn't even know wat i am doing every day.

simin did it simultaneously =)

today poured heavily in the morning. it's freezing cold when i got up the bus all drenched. no one's on the bus. it's my fault that i did not take the first step. i always try to forget abt everything but it always comeback like a flash back. and i have no idea how to deal with it. haven seen you for a long while, and hope to see you so soon.

another lamo day, everyday's a school day. nth better to talk abt other than school stuff. BORING!!!! just kill me!!! exams is days away. and i am already planning my holidays. so despo for it. i feel so useless talking abt school..

made pancakes after school
Pancakes!!
process>>>>

going for dental today for braces adjustment. goin there and slack again. the doctor seems to feed me with something, everytime after my appointment, i would slp immediatly after i reach home. can't wake up today, just too tired, body's full of muscle aches and my joints hurts. im with erin and miss her loads. i wanna cry... i have no idea wat to do next every time. no idea even wat to type next. miss erin dear. i nid her by my side. so missing her.

gd luck for cat woman, Amanda

and erin to come back

i refuse to appreciate the present one, i am more of a dreamer and wish that you would actually appreciate me. i miss you so, but you belong to a dream and the reality disapoints me. i always picture you in a dream, a nice guy who will hug me when i am cold, a guy who will pray for my well being. but the reality scares me when the change in you turns dramatic.

tag people!!! Dun just view. went to vivo, brought new heels!!! they are so cute!!! tried a 3 inch heel, it's so comfy. Just two straps and perfect balance. it dun wobble at all. got there to actually buy dad's b'day present and meet him there later on. but sadly, he will be late and he could not go too far and end up eating his "grant" 60th b'day at a stupid coffee shop. i did not buy sth speacil for him at vivo too. he has every thing and mum sugested that we buy him two packs of hair to cover his white hair, hahaha. no sales at vivo now. just lame winter clothing that we can't even wear in an air-conditioned room of humid Singapore.

exams coming and i've slacking for the last few days. i hate myself. it is just days away and i am still struggling to know the subjects for the first two term which i did badly. I am a super slacker.

i want that 3 inch heels. i am 160 tall and i call myself short!!

Nth great happened today. it's another boring school day. school's always boring, but my friends made it interesting. i go to school for no reason, just go for the sake of going. i did rather stay a home and be a solo person if i had a choice, but the world gives no one a choice. exam is just one week or more later, i am so slack!! i hardly noe anything, sad case. even the slackers study. hate math, but trying to do something abt it. hate it. hate math after coming to 3e1, mohan do not pay great attention to us like ms tan did. i love her!!! she makes sure that we practise and push us till we get distintions. but mohan, as a good teacher, just goes on too fast. that i can't bothered to listen. but i also can't be bother abt math hw, i am a pile of shit!!! he dun even punish or go through the hw. so, wat's the point? heackcare attitude from me too. i get tired so easily nowadays, it's mad.
i am mad. nth pls me and i get irritated easily nowadays. weather's a fault too. no rain for past week. and erin, if you read this. pls dun blame me for scolding so much vulgarities nowadays. it's yr own fault for not coming back and scold me in the face. i am out of control without erin!!

People!!! I am in love with hello kitty!! dun you find them adorable?? and the products are mostly pink!! i am crazy now, weather's too hot and i am getting hyper. remember hello kitty!!! i love it!! the pics of hello kitty was tooo adorable!! i want it!! i want the products!!! the hello kitty pink bicycle and bike or car!!! so cool!! it's gd to be rich, so that i can buy a mansion and decorate it the hellokitty way and buy all their products and limited collections!!! i am a despo.. if you are a gd guy and most of all, RICH, pls marry me. hahaha. and we can go despo over hello kitty together.
rock on!! hello kitty!!

chan neva come for chem lesson, so slack. then we sat outside the class. ms gan at the opposite block, ask someone to call me and shut the class up. then ting mention to me abt going to a cruise. more than 50% my parents won't allow. but i want to go!!!! watevs, i will ask mum and dad to tag along and leave thm alone at the casinos. hahaha. i want vacation with my friends. i want badly, the best is the the whole 3e1 gang go to canada or australi together. so cool rite? then free lodging from ms gan. hhaha, will save up lots.
this is so not going to come true, even if true, only few of the people will be going. i am dreaming again. i always dream.

miss erin lots!!!!!

no idea when i going to hear her voice again...
is she going to visit us?
or till the the time we are rich enough to visit her.?
missing someone is not a gd feeling.

wateva, i miss my hamsters again, i wanna sob and scream.
i miss my hamsters when are they going to die again?
they could not longer reproduce and i am so sad, should i buy more?
I love them lots,and ahma, get bunny pls.
after exams..

exams is two weeks away. kill me people. dying is the best way.
or a time turner? i will go to 2047. i will be 55 yrs old.
retired and slacking time. or will i be dead by then?
Scientist around the world, PLS IMPROVE BRAIN TRANSPLANT TECHNOLOGY or INCREASE MY IQ.
Wateva.
Not feeling gd nowadays, i have no idea how to cope during exams.
it's too much for a hollow-brainer to carry on.
if O'levels is the worst nightmare, then my death will be the worst night mare.
transplant my body parts or sell them so tht my folks will hav enough money to sustain till their death. since i would not be around to surpport them any more.
but then, i would be a partial living dead.
organs still alive but i would be dead and senseless. bless me

miss hammy lots that's shitty me

today ahma's wake finally ended. they played alot of hokkien music. found one hammy sick. her eyes could not open. i fed it will water but she pushed the water away. it breaks my heart to see her suffer. carol, but me two different sex robvoski. and ahma, start the bunny plan. and dad threw our tank away, kinda frustrated with him. i want to keep turtle or green frog. sickening dad, btw his bank card still with me. i can spend all i want. hahahaha

had an arguement with carol tpday. I scolded her for giving that fucking face early in the mornig. and scolded me and made me so stree. saying that why must i do my lit first, even though not argent. not my fault rite? can't scold me just becoz you say that i chiong lit and not chinese rite? watever. that put some fucking stress on me. ihate it and remember dun ever put any stress on me cause i would be fucking angry with you(a friend) and i won't blame teachers for putting stress on us, cause they paid to do tht. wateva. during PE carol talked to me, wateva.. if she neva start talking to me, i may not talk to her for life. i dun talk to people unless they talk to me first if that's their fault. wateva. but simin, sorry. but pls dun come in between us and try to be peace maker, i noe you mean us good but i am not the kind who say soory in an argument. and do not be the in between if you noes nth. i will hate you and the person together. but i will still love you as you may think that i have hurted carol. MAINPOINT TO SIMIN, don't be the peace maker if i am in that argument. MAINPOINT TO CAROL, don't just assume that.
then amanda going for checkup today. she felt sick during math and almost vomit. me and ahma freaked out by her that she may vomit on us. HAHAHa
gd luck amanda.

today's lame day. earthquake during chem, and people thinks that someone's shaking their chair. but dots.. i felt nothing. boring day. then jiaying acting weird. doom's day for her.

Ahma gradfather died and she has to attend the wake. so sad, i know her granddad too, he is always seen below the block. he is ok.. but dun expect him to go so fast, he looks healthy for his age. death took someone away again.

death just took away my hamster too. my favourite one, getting so emo over it, it won't bite, it will just stay and let you pat him, and given me many white babies. i love it the most and it loves me too. it was still jumping last night when i walked past, maybe it's due to my negligence that it has passed away. Each tym other hamster died i would just throw it away but now, i am still trying to give it life. he is so adorable, you can smile just by observing his actions. you will dote on it, slp with it. you will definatly love it. it's all my fault that it died. it's all my fault.

death is aways there to make people sad, to kill them. to harm people. taking away the loves one. yr favourite dog, your best friend, yr relative and yr family. taking away one by one, or all at once. they cause you to have a break down, depression. but without death, you will never know how much you love someone. you never noe what important role they plays in yr life. you will learn to appreciate them, but it's alwayts too late. leaving you with ever lasting regrets.

Rest in Peace For a ever lasting regret

Ok.. todya's lame lame day. during math, did graph. Understand it all. Hahaha. but for physics, its total crap. then for ss, we caught alvin taking glances of jenn each tym he moves. Hahaha. they appear to b gd frinds, but who knows? Lame post. thn shiity ahma never come, one day peace. i nid to buck up, but slping always comes first. ha!

Urgh!! so stress!! every teacher keep reminding us the exam is wks away.. 3 wks!! how am i going to study the stuff for the whole year, shitty. so stress, send me to london for a holiday pls!! if you love me, send me to london for a holiday pls!! forget to buy Praise spongey's present. smack my ass. then Yee Lin birthday during exams, how to cope? ok, find. find something better pay back then. haiz... list of thing to-do today.. 1)forget abt zac efron ( i am just being a fan) 2)Chem mind map 3)Throw away my lighter 4)Download Bio slides 5)To play when you're gone song repeatly 6)Do bio notes. 7)physics ws 8)Admath Hw Conclusion, is one day enough?

Deep in thoughts..Emo!!

kinda emo subject! thinking about how people leaving me. first was rebecca, leaving for australia. but at least she comes back. then yee lin. she moving to yishun for her new house. that within the country. nut i really miss her for goodness sake. she is my best gurl and life without a best friend by yr side is really lonely. i seldom meet her. now that the distance is so far and our free time dosen't meet. i miss her and that there is one person less who cares for me by my side in school. it saddens me and that people are leaving me. i just miss tyms we had at our secret place during recess. kelly, and yeelin with me. talking abt who we hate and gurls stuff. and math lessons with yeelin during sec2 talking bunch of lame jokes and improving our math results at the same while. and the period before assembly sitting down and talking abt more things. more fun. but she is gone now, to a new bloody school. a lost of friend..

Then the sudden news of erin leaving for canada and not cuming back anymore. she sucks. my gd friends leaving one by one. is this the punishment from Him for not loving my friends enough? it really tortures me that they are leaving. erin leaving, one part of me is missing one part of the school is missing. the motivation from her gone. the sarcastic remarks that motivates me it gone. the remarks she makes that somehow controls me from doing weird things disappear. more f words from me now, listen and hear it out.

after she left, i had a dream tht erin had cancer, that scares me. being frightened abt the chances of her leaving for treatment. i just dreamt that ms gan for some reason just tell us that Erin left because she had cancer. i think i cried during my sleep, that crying part was so real. so real that i am afraid that some things might happen to my friend. Losing a friend to cananda is good enough, if losing a friend to death. This might kill me. this mind chase me insanity.

those friends that are part of me is gone. they are like pillars that supports me from falling. they are gone leaving lesser pillars, this stops me from moving. moving slower than normal. lesser friends, means lesser laughter, lesser joy, lesser jokes. i do cry easily every now and then. so easily, i had no idea wat would become of me if crying at every little thing becomes my habit. any ideas? stop laughing and start crying with me.

to emo together That's me!! good friends= carol and erin YAYA's new home Missing Erin New maid from italy

renovated my blog!! thks to amanda. dun say i neva blog abt you pls. hahahaha. But i edited some. hahaha. finally got some clue by trying out the codes. hahahaha. I changed to pic hahaha. nice rite? SAY YES!!! hahahaha. remember to tag hahaha.

Ikea.

went over to ikea for ideas!! hahaha. getting new stuff ni my room soon. today's is the first day of my one week holiday. it's going to end soon that it has started!! quite sad to think that my hols going to end. the busy days back. wateva.

wateva. i planned the itinerary for the day. Ahahaha. ok fine. first we will take some light breakfast--then bath--then head off the ikea--then for meatballs!!!(haven't take it for a long tym, love,it!!)--to the showrooms!!--rest for dinner--then to queensway for more shopping!!!

this really tire my folks!! they were half dead. wateva. when we shop, i was freaking out!! hahaha. so many great ideas there. i took back many pamphlets back for reference!! a girl was sitting i a wardrobe and was looking dead. hahaha. i freaked out!! hahaha. and i screamed!! kinda embarassing.

at queensway, i brought a nike bottle!! so cool! with abstract flora prints on it!! and it's PINK!!! then to 2nd floor. found a shop which sells lots of skinny which are so cheapo!! haha. brought two skinny.

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