it's CNY holidays. heehee. lol. 5 days. i skippd school on wed. i can't be bothered to attend those stupid events held in school which is the same every year. watever. this year's chinese new year is nothing. or not celebrated. i just wish to go malaysia and celebrate with my mother's side. it's better there. the crowd and atmosphere.

here, we just have to go visiting at night to my uncle's place. where no dinner is served like years before. the fun is gone slowly. 40 plus people crammed into the 3 rom flat. all standing...zzz. they did not even stay for long. it's bad. unlike the previous years where they go to my aunt's place. two storeys. a big garden. too bad. my grandma can't travel. she is so skinny now. compared to before and losing her voice. softer. 95 year old.... omg. i can't imagine living for so long in this world.

i still remember that in the past. my aunt cook and the kids play outside at the road. poppers and chasing around. what wat have the kids become? bitch and bastards. and we don't talk any more. sadly. i am closer to someone living in malaysia than those in singapore. i love my malaysian cousins. love them to bits. have to meet them through a computer screen is so... their place is so crowded and nice. mine's quiet. like we don't celebrate at all. what the...

just hope that i could celebrate with them next year. i love them!!!

pms.. lately. lol. feel like crying at this moment. lol. what has become of me? a victim of stress. wat stress? i am so stress that i gave up my life and lay down for a rest. i can't even remember things well nowadays. so, studying is so a great problem. i miss those hangovers.

this is bothering me. i am stuck to dreams. i don't wish to wake up and face this ugly world. nothing is nice. wat you see is nice at first, but you will soon get sick of it when you look in a more indepth way.

i am so sick of celebs. their ugly side of life. so ugly. i hate them to bits. what are they? bad examples of life. those who looked the most innocent and nice is the bad guys. while those who looked bitchy and bad has a heart of gold and is a victim. why this way? it's called life. the most innocent are fakes. they can hide their true self so well. while those that seem like a bitch can't hide and is always seems as a bitch.

i also seem to quit alchoholic drinks. i don't want to in the second bastard in the house. but i want to be drunk without drinking.